The Funny One

My special brand of slightly self-deprecating humor draws directly from pain I have felt at one time or another. My experiences make for a well balanced blend of fat girl problems, sex-deprived singlehood, and mild to moderate alcohol abuse.

"On a scale of 1 to 10 cats, how single would you say you are?"

"How many calories do you burn rocking back and forth in the fetal position, gently sobbing? I'm asking for a friend." 
"Who needs a life when there's Youtube, pizza and sex? ... Well there's Youtube and pizza, anyway." 
"Stare all you want with your judge-y face: I'm going to eat the fuck out this whiskey & cookie dough ice cream float"

Often, I don't even have to wait for the pain to ease before I start cracking jokes. Making people think on common struggles from a different perspective and - more importantly - making them laugh about it is healing for every one involved. And from there, whatever heartache I may have been feeling starts to dissipate.

They don't call laughter the best medicine for no reason.

Too Much Time On My Hands

Before you read any furher, please know that I am in the process of getting Charles made into a t-shirt on - Please be a dear and vote for us?

An e-mail sent to Cuppy Cake earlier today...

"You may be happy to know that, after numerous trials, I’ve started over and our mythical hybrid beast is coming along nicely. It’s green and purple. I should have a finished Unicornus Rex by tomorrow, at which time we can commence the cultivation of more ridiculous and slightly insane ideas… I tried to explain to Bro what I was working on. It went a little like this:
B: What are you up to?
K: I don’t wanna say. It’s kind of embarrassing…
B: Oh come on, I won’t judge.
K: Ok. I’m creating a…. unicorn/t-rex hybrid. On my Photoshop, that is. It’d be silly to attempt that in real life. Too big, you see? The mess would be ridiculous. Anyways, Cuppy helped me come up with the idea and I’m trying to bring it to life. On my computer.
K: So there’s that.
B: I’m happy you and Cuppy found each other.
K: Tell me about it! Who else would understand the magestical appeal of a Unicornus Rex??
Back to my troll cave for now, Precious!
 Love, Kay."

The creation of this mythical beast was really a no-brainer: I have always been drawn to the magestical whimsy of unicorn farts (AKA: Rainbows) which, balanced with the fierceness and tiny arms of a T-Rex, makes for a magnificent beast that I will now take as my spirit animal and also my steed.

This Unicornus Rex is named Charles and was created by myself using Photoshop. As you can see, Charles still has all the common difficulties presented by T-Rex's tiny arms (or in this case, hoofs) but do not be deceived; Charles will not hesitate to fuck you up if you cross him.